Spiders in my Bathroom

Like Snakes on a Plane.

Anyway.

This morning there was a spider in my bathroom. Sink, to be more specific. I saw it poking it's little legs out, trying to get a feel for what it's wanton new home would be like. Simply because it was a spider I saw no use in trying to bargain with it. (Had it been a cockroach, for example, yes. I would have tried to reason with the thing.) But spiders? No. They're either in or out. And this guy was definitely here. So. I quickly finished folding my towels, as was my main purpose for being in there, and decided what I would do next. It was at that precise moment that the spider must have been deciding exactly what IT was going to do next. It crawled out of the sink drain. I gasped. It crawled back in. Our feelings for each other were mutual, apparently. I proceeded to proceed (ha) with my course of action. I turned the hot water on really high. In my mind I could actually picture what would happen. It would be washed down the drain, never to be heard of again. I actually started humming "the itsy bitsy spider." But I must have forgotten the part about the itsy-bitsy spider climbing up again. And I did. Because that's what IT did. Climbed back up. The hot water seemed to be pissing it off. Go figure.

At this point I immediately started jumping up and down from foot to foot yelling that there was a "HUGE SPIDER" in my sink. Well, whining may be a more accurate word. I grabbed the closest roommate and begged and pleaded him to take care of it. He grabs a paper towel. I explained: "I don't think you understand the seriousness of this spider. A paper towel just isn't gonna cut it. Take it from me!" (as I continue to jump from foot to foot, now in the kitchen.) I suggest a shoe of some sort. A flip-flop is employed. We go into the bathroom (well, he pretty much just goes in. I peek my head around the doorframe). He slams the flip-flop into the sink and I scream. "Is it gone?" I ask. He explains that it is gone. But is hesitant. "Is it dead?" I ask. He calmly explains that it is not exactly dead at the moment but the back end is completely smashed and it is now washed down the drain with hot, hot water. (oh yeah. I've left the hot water running.) If not dead already, he explains, it will be shortly. I thank him and offer ice cream or something equally as precious like cookies and milk, and everyone goes on about their business. Me? I leave the hot water running for another good 7 minutes. Then, just to be safe I pull the stopper on the drain. At least for tonight, I think I'll be safe.

P.S. It really was a big spider! I wasn't exaggerating. Simply because the Wolf Spider is "not poisonous" does not make it any less life-threatening to me.

Gross.

Endurance50

So, to inspire us all (or rather to make me feel lazy and like my life will never amount to anything) (-; I've added a new "faithful bloggower" to my list. At least check it out if you're feeling tired or like your leg (or tooth, ah hem...) is sore, and it might make you feel a little... better. This guy is crazy, that's all I have to say.

And plus it's been a while since my last blog and it seems easier to just put a new link up of a worthwhile blog than actually write one...

(-:

Another day, Another theory

As I sit in front of my super cool computer on this beautiful Saturday afternoon, I am torn between blogging topics. I can't decide if it's the fact that the wonderful "dentist drugs" have not worn off (I'm actually pretty sure I vomitted the remains of that up along with my soup last night) or the fact that too much time to sit around and think has proven to be just that... too much time to sit around and think.

My latest conspiracy theory it is, then:

Cell phone voicemails. I was once accused of having a "too long voicemail." Now I don't have one at all, well except for the automated one that comes on when I'm "not available." BUT, now phone compaines are adding on to the voicemail process. NOW after a personalized message the caller (96.3% of the time) has to wait for that really friendly-and-has-a-lot-of-personality lady to throw her two sense in. No longer can we just have, "sorry I missed you, leave a message." BEEEEP. No, now we have her there to clarify anything that might have been forgotten (or maybe left out on purpose?). So after your short and sweet message, here we go. Another 10 seconds of "talk time" that will be added on to your phone bill. Because obviously we need our voicemail assistant to come on, after hearing the voicemail about not being around, and tell us that the person is not there, but here's how to leave a message. After the tone. No kidding. I actually sort of see this as a step backwards. If she would have appeared like 10 years ago when voicemail was just coming out, then we would have all nodded when she gave us the directions to "leave a voice message, wait for the tone." Because ten years ago, it was a little confusing what to do and when that BEEEP was heard. Not so much anymore.

So back to why this is a conspiracy theory. I think that people were getting real smart and got all of their friends in on this whole, "leave a short voicemail because then it won't take up so many of my minutes/seconds to leave you a message," and so cell phone companies were losing all sorts of money. So they hired this lady to add on to everyone's voicemails so message calls would automatically be 'that much longer.' Sorry to say I don't have a solution to any of this. I guess she really just annoys me is all. So I turned it into a conspiracy theory.