A Fly On The Wall

I have decided that if I were to be a fly (in my next life...?) I would be the smartest fly EVER!! Here's my plan/advice, (in case anyone else might become a fly in their next life):

**If a huge, 120 pound object begins to swat at me visciously, I will go SOMEWHERE ELSE. I will not stick around or come back for more.
**If a bright pink object is continuously being flung in my direction while sitting on a window, I will go outside.
**When I see bright lights, I will go in the other direction.
**If a ginormous, human-like form is sleeping on the couch, I might go in for a taste. BUT, if the aforesaid ginormous human-like form begins to flail at me, I will go somehwere else.
**I will not attempt to make my meals out of human picnic food, while it is being picniced on.
**Oh, and spider webs are no good, either.

I think that's really it. In short, I would stay away from humans and their stuff.
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